


As Heaven or Hell Decide

by shauds



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Blue Devil (DCU Comics), DCU (Comics)
Genre: Because they were friends, Friendship, Gen, No editing we die like comics continuity, Reunion, and cannon sucks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-13
Updated: 2020-12-09
Packaged: 2020-12-14 13:41:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21016688
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/shauds/pseuds/shauds
Summary: Eddie's visiting his Aunt's grave when he's almost caught in the crossfire of a fiery battle. More surprising, while the person who saves him isn't out of place in a graveyard, that he's alive there definitely is.Or, Jason gets swept up on his way to the Titans Tower and winds up reuniting with an old friend instead. Oh, and hit by a fireball.





	1. Chapter 1

"I got fired again, Aunt Marla." Eddie looks at the wrinkled picture in his hands, at the smiling faces of him, Dan and Marla instead of the stone square marking her grave.

It's sunny today. That doesn't mean much, it's almost always sunny in LA. You'd think the weather in the movie capital of the world would be a little more dramatic. At least around a graveyard, at least for a while,but no, it's sunny as always. Eddie wishes it wasn't, that it will rain just a little. Sure it's dumb, and he knows it wouldn't help him any, but sunshine's for happy scenes, and there've been so few happy scenes in Eddie's life lately that the warm weather can sometimes make him feel like he's just a background shot in someone else's.

The grave he's leaning against belongs to some guy who lived a full seventy-something years. It's been tilted back like this since before he started coming here he thinks, but he knows that him leaning against it every time isn't helping it any. He really shouldn't, if he ever catches someone doing that to Marla's grave he'd be so mad, and the least he can do is try and stand up straight for her.

"Sorry." He apologizes to the old guy and pushes off from the stone. His fingers pinch tighter at the picture. "Didn't bother me too much this time." If Eddie's being honest, it hasn't bothered him all that much for a while.

Internally, he debates telling her that he'd been fired because he'd been too caught up in comic book to report back on time, but he can't tell if she'd think it's funny, or she'd be mad.

"I've still got enough money to hold me over till I get another one, I'll be okay." He makes himself put the picture away and smiles down at her headstone instead. It's wrong, Aunt Marla was taller than him, he's never had to look down at her, could barely imagine having to, she should have gotten one of those huge, angel markers that dotted the graveyard, something big, like she was. "It's like you said, my talent isn't fetching coffee and donuts." Eddie feels very small when he says, "I just don't really know what it is yet."

He lets his eyes rest on the picture one more time, on Dan, Eddie hasn't seen him in more than a year, he hopes he's not dead again too. "It's not being a sidekick, that's for **sure**." Nobody needs a weight like Eddie dragging them down.

"I wish you were here to help me figure it out." His eyes are burning, he's not going to cry in front of Marla's grave, he's okay, really he is. She never told him he **couldn't** but he doesn't want to. See, this is what the rain is supposed to be for. "I get you're really busy up there, probably making the coolest movie ever, I just...," he swallows, pulls up his Captain Carrot T-Shirt to quickly brush away the wetness on his face. "If you had any friends you could send down, I'd sure appreciate it."

Eddie waits a second for a response he knows he won't get, then he chuckles at how dumb just the idea is, he's not going to get a guardian angle, he doesn't need one half as much as most people. He crouches down and rests his hand against the rough granite her names been engraved in, it's the closest he can get to feeling her short of wrapping his arms around the stone and pretending she can hug him back. "See you soon." He promises, gets up to leave and..."

He feels the arms wrapping tightly around his middle, a flash of red, being tossed aside, words screamed too close to his ear for him to make them out. Then, a rough tackle to the ground knocks all of the air clear out of his lungs. There isn't time to ask why, not even for himself, because less than a second later, the weight is flung off him and a wave of heat slams into him in his place, almost scorching his skin along with the edge of his Captain Carrot shirt.

When it's over his ears are ringing worse than that time he'd gotten into a Witchfire concert and his parents had yelled his ears off. Sand and small rocks are raining down on him. Blearily, Eddie blinks, and pulls himself up to his elbows to get a look at what hit him.

The first thing his eyes catch on is the crater, still hot and smoking only meters from where he now stands. "Hot damn." Eddie just keeps from whistling as he pats out the sparks on his shirt. The headstone he's tried to keep himself from leaning against is flat on it's side, pulled by the blast right out from the ground, he knows before he steps around it to get a better look at the crater that this is a bad idea.

At first, the smoke makes it hard to see, but then he spots it, the crumpled shape lying on the the other side. Eddie scrambles over faster than he can think, a sharp, unpleasant felling stabbing at his chest. Soon he's kneeling besides him and he's gotten his shaking hands to do the most rudimentary of checkups, pulse, he's breathing, doesn't need CPR, burns on his leg. He goes to check for broken ribs - will he even need to know that for the ambulance? - when he sees the colors peeking out from the tears in the gray bodysuit.

Red, the tip of an R and a golden ring. 

"No." He whispers, not because he doesn't want it to be true, but because he knows that it **can't** be. This kind of thing just doesn't happen, not for Eddie. 

Hands shaking worse than they did that time he got his hands on a few too many energy drinks, Eddie brushes aside some of the dirt that's settled on the guy's face, better revealing his features, so familiar even if it weren't for the red domino mask. He reaches for the '**R**', sure for some reason that it will be as easy to brush aside as the dirt had been. He didn't get the chance to find out. A hand snaps up and catches Eddie's wrist before he can touch it.

The voice is deep and rough, it rattles with his chest. "Eddie?"

"Jason." Eddie breathes, he catches a flicker of recognition and its like a spell has broken, Eddie forgets to be confused and immediately he turns his pockets inside out in search of his cellphone. "Hold still, I'm gonna call you an ambulance and..."

"No!" Jason's hand closes around the cellphone in Eddie's, his grip surprisingly strong. He's shaking his head in short, jerky little motions. "No, no..." His eyes squeeze shut and he turns his head into the ground. "No hops-- tle."

"No hops..." It takes Eddie a moment to understand, what he means. Jason's not going to be clarifying **why** he doesn't want a hospital, aside from his sharp breathing, he's gone quiet.

**Breathing**, at a graveyard. Alive. Jason's alive. Eddie looks around at the smoking hole in the ground, the damage done to the markers and headstones around them. He thinks he can hear more explosions in the distance. Hospital or not, they can't stay here.

"Hot damn." He whispers again.

****

*******

He winces at how sharp and rough the gravel sounds under Jason’s boots as he’s dragging him along, his arms hooked under Jason’s in a way he just knows would be very uncomfortable if Jason were awake enough to notice. It’s not Eddie’s fault, the guys just too damn heavy now, and no hospital means no ambulance, even if those weren’t at capacity with all the screaming and explosions that have only just stopped reaching them from the distance. 

Jason’s been still since Eddie first got him up back at the graveyard, none of the tugging and twisting Eddie’s done has elicited so much as a twitch from him. If Jason’s breaths weren’t coming in so raspy and deep, Eddie would have been a lot more worried that he was, maybe even worried enough for him have ran back to the inner city to bed for help off the Titans. 

He’s about that worried now actually, but they’re long gone by now and the hospitals are all full, so all Eddie can do is focus on the breathing. Breathing, from Jason, who’s supposed to be dead, with a coffin an a headstone and everything, just like Aunt Marla. Sure, Eddie hasn’t seen any of those, but he knows they **were** there, he’d almost seen them. 

He has a bag full of returned letters that say Jason was gone, not here and huge and breathing in raspy breaths while Eddie drags him through the street because he got hit by a damn fireball to save Eddie right after Eddie visited his Aunt. 

What if Jason stops breathing. 

It’s right then, like he’s tired of all Eddie’s thinking that a groan abruptly leaves Jason’s mind. Eddie’s not proud when he starts and drops Jason’s weight all at once. 

Jason harshly mutters something under his breath when he hits the ground in a language that’s probably not English and tries to shake out his arms. 

“Jason!” Eddie swallows and leans over Jason, blocking the sun with his shadow from eyes that slide open just a crack. 

“Shhh.” Jason hisses out, weakly flopping one hand at Eddie and then flinching when the motion sets off the pins and needles he must have after the way Eddie was carrying him. “Loud.” He groans and moves the hands to his ears. 

“Did my Aunt send you from heaven?” Eddie whispers, and he immediately regrets it, even before Jason’s eyes snap open fully and the scrunch of his brows is more confusion than pain. If Eddie had any doubts that this was Jason, they melt away at the frown so severe it really can’t be anything else. “Uh…” Eddie turns his head quickly away from it and wills his face to not be as red as he knows it is. “Nevermind.” He sucks in a breath and turns back to Jason. “Your okay, right?” 

“Eddie.” Jason says, eyes shut, not like it’s a question, but an obvious answer he’s just figured out, then he pats his chest, shakes out his arms again, and lets out another groan as he lets his head hit the gravelly asphalt again, he tips his head in a slight nod. “M’alive.” 

It’s only a couple of steady breaths and Jason’s opening his eyes again. He rolls over and gets an arm under him to prop himself up while he cranes his head about to take in the street. “The fuck?” He says, squinting at a respectable sized hole in the ground only a few feet away and then up at Eddie, a questioning height to his brows. 

“Demon things, I think.” Eddie shrugs and turns up his hands. That’s what he guessed the dead thing Eddie had found next to what had looked like an exploded helmet had been. “The Teen Titans took care of it.” 

Jason shakes his head while running fingers through his hair, a curve to his lips that Eddie can’t quite read, but might be disgust. 

“Whatever.” He waves Eddie off and gets his other arm under him, Eddie wants to tell him not to try and stand by himself, but Jason’s up on his feet before he gets the chance. 

Then Jason’s tilting over like the leaning tower of Pisa and doesn’t even seem to know it. 

Eddie moves fast, gets his arms hooked under Jason’s again and puts all his strength into making sure his friend doesn’t end up on the ground again. Hot damn he’s heavy, it’s like catching a crate full of medicine balls and Eddie almost doesn’t manage it. 

“I gotcha.” Eddie grins down at Jason, relieved despite the strain on his shoulders. 

Jason blinks up at him, his eyes wide and just as surprised as Eddie feels. Then they narrow and he tugs himself out of Eddie’s hold, he takes enough steps to put him just out of Eddie’s reach, again before Eddie can react. 

“What were you **doing**?” Jason traces the ‘R’ at his chest as he looks at Eddie and then again at the destruction all around them. He looks skittish, like he’s about to try and run or something, and going by the way his legs are shaking, he’ll just hurt himself more if he does. 

“You said no hospitals.” Eddie raises his hands slowly, holds them on either side of his head to show he’s not going to lunge at Jason or anything like that. “And I figured you musta had a reason, so I was just gonna bring you over to my place until you woke up.” He steps closer and Jason doesn’t move away. “You’re sure you’re okay, Jayce?” 

Jason gives his head another quick shake at the nickname. “You don’t just **bring** random people over to your house Eddie.” He tilts again, but this time he catches himself before he can fall. “**You** said that.” 

Eddie does remember saying that, but in reference to horror movies and not dead friends who show up out of… “Yeeaaah.” Eddie drags the word out and shrugs. “But it’s not a house, and you’re not random,” and probably wouldn’t have said that if he were an evil specter, “well, maybe a little , but even if I didn’t know you at all, you took an honest to god **fireball** for me.” He shrugs and moves a little closer to his increasingly unsteady friend. “What was I gonna do otherwise?” 

Jason blinks and stares at Eddie, his mouth opens like he’s going to say something, but doesn’t, even when Eddie closes the last of the distance between them. 

There are relieved sighs from both of them when Eddie gets his arm around Jason’s shoulders and takes some of the considerable weight off his legs. 

Jason casts another defeated look around the ruins of the street again, then shoots it up at Eddie.“Thanks Eddie.” He mumbles and lets Eddie help him down the street. 

“Just don’t pass out again.” Eddie scoffs, but he can’t keep the grin off his face. “You’re **heavy**.”

“No promises.” Jason says, but the determined set to his brow when he looks ahead speaks of him at least trying to keep himself upright. He does okay most of the way. 

****

*******

Even by the time they get to the trailer in the small lot a little under half a mile – so Eddie tells him – from the graveyard, Jason still can’t completely convince himself to a single reason why he’s here. Because he needs a place to recuperate after that stupid stunt he pulled - _it’s wasn’t stupid, don’t even think it was stupid_ \- is the most obvious answer, and time looking spent looking for some other place those kids running around in the chaos of the city would be wasted. 

There’s always the chance that the Titans come knocking, and Eddie hands him over, because Eddie’s always come just short of **worshipping** them, and feeling like a piece of overdried jerky, Jason’s not in any shape to fight them all off. What is he doing? Why is he doing this? There are a lot of locks on that door. 

“So, uh, you’re still thirsty, right?” Eddie’s tone has just enough trepidation to tip Jason off as the door swings open. 

Jason nods and he rests his weight against the doorway for a handful of moments and peers inside after Eddie. It looks even smaller on the inside than it does outside. A kitchenette, stove fridge there’s a box of comics and an assortment of scattered tools on the countertops in the corner adjacent a short fabric lined booth. There’s one open door at the end that leads into a bedroom with the end of an unmade bed all Jason can made out from where he stands. 

“Don’t drink the water,” Eddie throws over his shoulder, “I’ll grab us some sodas.” 

When Jason follows Eddie inside, he can see the TV still playing on the wall right next to the door, some B-rate creature flick with a puppet… thing crawling across the ground. Watching it, Jason doesn’t pay enough attention to where he’s putting his feet and, he startled when something rattles against the actual ground, he steps quickly towards the booth and his eyes fix on the wheeled toolbox that’s moving away from him. 

“Huh.” Jason blinks and takes it in, there’s nothing about the place that isn’t the Eddie he remembers, aside from it being a trailer and not Marla Bloom’s house at least. He’s not sure whether this is what surprises him, or the fact that he’s not really surprised, doesn’t know what he expected. 

“Yeah, I **know** it’s not much, and it’s messy and all right now.” Eddie huffs, his head briefly reappears from within the confines of his fridge to give Jason a look that’s part annoyed and part nervous before he shoves it between the shelves again. “I’ve been busy.” 

“T’s not that.” Jason scoffs and quickly swipes a hand along the seat of the booth – no dust – before he drops down into it, he’s not here to pretend he isn’t tired as all hell. “Should see some of the places I crash in, this is nothing.” Cleanliness hasn’t been his biggest concern these past couple months. “You’re just so…” Jason waves his hand at Eddie. How does he describe how absurd this is, how Eddie’s here, a part of Jason’s life he never thought he’d revisit, and he’s grown up, but he’s still the same, even while he’s different. **Is ** there even a word for that? And how somehow Jason’s ended up here, and Jason’s very much **not** that? Jason shakes his head and he clears his throat with a shrug. “Is your Aunt around?” 

Eddie stills getting up from his crouch at the fridge. Jason can read it off him, the sudden weight that pulls Eddie’s back taught. “Aunt Marla’s, she’s…”, his throat bobs and his hands squeeze on the two cans of soda he’s carrying over. “I was just visiting her when you showed up.” 

The graveyard, Jason thinks of the stones flung around in the blast, he’d thought he might have imagined the name he’d read in those few short seconds. His chest constricts, his ribcage momentarily too tight for his lungs. This shouldn’t happen, he’s not supposed to care about this sort of thing, doesn’t know why it’s so upsetting, that this one thing hadn’t remained good when Jason was gone.

“God, KD, who… what…?” He **just** keeps his hand from shaking when he accepts the offered can of soda. “Are you…” Jason hand itches to move to Eddie, but he scrunches down on the impulse and holds firmly onto the can instead. 

“It’s…,” Eddie sits down next to Jason and tucks a strand of his longer red hair behind his ear. “It’s not okay, but I mean, I’m doing fine. It an accident, she was scoping out a filming locations and the helicopter went down.” Eddie smiles, but that makes it worse. “Been more’n a year already.” 

“Fuck.” Jason’s throat feels drier, as if that should be possible, he cracks open the soda, but he doesn’t make the difference it should when he tosses it back, he couldn’t even tell what flavor it is. He looks around at the not quite yet rundown trailer with a new eye. “This whole world is such a **crapfest**.” 

Eddie looks at Jason like he’s just grown an appendage from his neck. Considering that Jason’s just been hit by a fucking fireball of unknown origin and teleported who the fuck knows how, that’s not out of the question. He runs a hand round his neck just to be sure. “What?” 

Eddie snorts and ducks his head to the side as he shakes it, his too long hair swishing about. “Nothing, was just expecting another ‘sorry for your loss’.” 

“That too.” Jason takes another swig from his soda can, then turns round and round on the tabletop in small motions, he sighs heavily. Whatever hit him, or whatever he hit, it took too much out of him, he doesn’t have time for this. He should leave. Joker’s in a closet in Gotham, and he should leave. “I know it doesn’t help, but I’m…” ‘_here_’, he almost says, but he isn't, so he doesn't. "If you need anything." 

“Thanks.” Eddie says, he smiles again, and this time it’s lighter, easier, and Jason almost thinks that it makes a little piece of him feel the same. 

It’s just because people don’t smile at him anymore, not like that anyway, not in a long time, so Jason shakes it off. 

“I can’t believe you’re here.” Eddie breaths the same way he did the night of their only real teamup, when Jason had flown over to meet with him. “Hey, uh,” he sets his soda down next to Jason’s, “whatever you’re doing now, if you needed a place to stay till you’re,” he waves a hand at Jason’s torn up, burned out everything, then pats their seat, “this thing’s a pull out couch, and I stay here alone.” His eyes are wide and hopeful and anxious when he turns them on Jason. “You can hang here as long as you want, and we could catch up and order a pizza or something? Like that weekend we were planning…” He trails off and shifts uncomfortably, “before.” 

No. The schedule’s already been thrown off, he needs to get back, tighten things back up before they’re tossed too far off course. He can’t stay because he’s feeling nostalgic and the world isn’t fair. Jason has to say no. 

“Guess I could go for a pizza.” He says instead, looking down at the soda sloshing around at the bottom of the can. “I’m not enough of a dumbass to try going anywhere like this.”

It won’t do him any good if he’s found passed out on a plane to Gotham either. Spending the night is just safer, he should take advantage of the shelter, it’ll just be one night. 

Jason shifts uncomfortably at the bright grin, too bright for him, he gets in response. 

“I’ll order it now.” Eddie leaps up from the booth and vanishes into the little room at the other end of the trailer. “Time hasn’t turned you against pineapple, right?”

The pizza’s pretty good, the couch is only marginally softer than the floor, and the night isn’t spent catching up at all, Jason's not willing to lie enough for that, and Eddie doesn't push. Instead they page through the comics Eddie’s continued to accumulate through the years, and then argue as much as they ever did over the storylines.

It’s peaceful, surreally so. For half of a moment, spent staring at the movie still playing muted and on repeat after Eddie’s fallen asleep, Jason catches himself thinking that maybe taking a few days to recuperate wouldn’t be the worst thing. The other half of that moment is spent getting up and out before that thought can take route.

He’s long gone by the time Eddie wakes up.

****

*******

A couple weeks later, it’s finally raining, little droplets that cover everything and make the graveyard smell like grass and leaves and just, green things. The grey sky makes it **look** more like a graveyard skin, but the wet just makes everything feel more alive. Thing’s shouldn’t feel alive at a graveyard, but Eddie finds he still kind of likes it.

Eddie’s standing back at Aunt Marla’s headstone. Well, at her new headstone, after the old one got smashed. It’s shiny and black and surrounded by colorful flowers that have been planted all around it. More expensive even than the one all their friends had pooled together to buy before. Eddie didn’t pay for it, he doesn’t know who did, it was just there the next time he came here. He likes to think he has an idea, though, but he doesn’t want to let himself think that too much.

”Finally got another job.” He tells the stone now, and not the much more weathered picture in his hands. Aunt Marla’s still the same in the picture, still just the way Eddie remembers her, but he thinks she’d like this headstone, and it feels like a waste to ignore it. “Still the same old.” He tries to smile, and shrugs. “Enough to keep me going till I move on to whatever, and the boss is okay, doesn’t yell as much as the last one.”

The other headstones have been replaced too, the one Eddie always leans against is standing upright and whole, for the first time Eddie’s ever seen. Leaning against it doesn’t make him feel as bad. Still shouldn’t do it though. “Sorry.” He brushes his hand against it to brush aside whatever imaginary dirt he might have left behind along with some warm droplets of water. 

”They’re making another Gray Ghost movie, and the set’s really pretty awesome, heard they might get Norm on it. It’ll be nice to see him again.” Eddie bites his lip and looks up at the clouds again. There’s aren’t any fireballs coming down at him this time, just like there haven’t been the last three times he’s been here. Beings disappointed by that is dumb. “Be nice to see if I could see Jayce again too. I keep thinking I imagined it, or he got hurt somewhere.”

It’s pretty clear Jason was in some kind of trouble, because of course he was, and Eddie hadn’t tried anywhere near hard enough to find out what it was, or if he could help.

”Hey, if you’re not too busy, could you get someone good to look out for him?” He waits, but as always there’s no answer. It’s okay, he doesn’t need one. He kneels down to make sure the few flowers he brought with his are nestled nicely in their basket amongst the planted one. “Guess you want me to get outta the rain before I catch something, but I’ll be back soon.”

He brushes the damp and the grass clinging to his shorts as he stands. “So, bye for…”

It might not be a fireball this time, but it takes Eddie by just as much surprise. Silent as it is, moving towards Eddie in the rain he’s much better covered against in his dark hoody and jeans, a duffle bag tossed over his shoulder.

”Jason?” Eddie thinks the rain must be messing with his vision at first, but a couple seconds later, there’s no question again. 

”Hey Eddie.” Jason’s voice is soft and rough, like he’s just getting over a bad cold, he’s paler and his face a bit leaner than it was those few weeks ago, but it’s still him.

”Uh.” Eddie drags his eyes slowly between Aunt Marla’s stone and Jason, who scuffs at the ground with his heel and squeezes the strap of his bag. Who’s got bandages wound round his throat and dark shadows under his eyes. Thankfully Eddie stops himself before he says something really embarrassing again. “You came back.”

”Yeah.” Jason speaks again in his whisper, the upturn of his lips isn’t a smile, but it’s trying to be. “Sorry for taking off like that.” He shifts the bag again. “There was a thing.” He angles his head away, probably too quickly, because he flinches and his hand goes to the bandages.

”What happened?” Eddie struggles to tear his eyes from the hand, but meeting Jason’s eyes is even harder. He looks worse, somehow, than he had after the fireball.

”An accident.” Jason says the word like it’s acidic as the smiles turns, and Eddie could swear his eyes are greener in this light, but he shakes his head and it’s gone before he’s done clearing his throat. Eddie thinks it’s better he doesn’t press right now. “Is your pull out still open? I’ll buy the pizza this time.”

”Yeah, sure.” Eddie looks once more at the stone and has to bite down on his lips to keep from saying it. “Yeah.” He repeats again and feels himself grin. “There a really good place on the way back actually.” He steps past Jason and waves him to follow along and pretend he doesn’t hear the outtake of breath.

”Thanks.” Jason’s whisper-sigh feels a lot louder than it is as he falls into step besides Eddie. “Hey, is Felina Furr really evil?”

”Are you s’pose to be talking?” Eddie frowns at Jason.

”No.” Jason shakes his head and doesn’t hesitate to answer anymore than he had the last time Eddie had years ago when Eddie had asked if Batman knew he’d caught a plane to California. He blinks very slowly at Eddie.

Eddie snorts and rolls his eyes, but he answers anyway. “Yeah, she is.”

”Damnit.” Jason’s grumbles and has to cough to clear his throat a second later.

It’s not funny, but Eddie laughs at Jason’s put upon pout anyway. Whatever happened to him, Jason’s really not supposed to do much talking though, so they don’t that day, but he’s still there the next morning.


	2. Breakfast

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eddie tries to process some things and Jason makes breakfast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello inability to leave things as one shots, my old friend.

Eddie doesn’t want to think too much about the hows of Jason being back. How he’s walking and eating and talking a little too little, but still way too much for how much it seems to hurt him, if it were in any way a fun story, he knows Jason would have told him by now. After the way Jason had brushed off the question of those bandages around his neck the first time, Eddie doesn’t want to ask too much about what they’re hiding either. There’s plenty, maybe too much even, for them to talk about until too late into the night.

Having to be up early for his first day at his new job tomorrow, Eddie has to go to bed what here classifies as early, and Jason doesn’t respond with anymore than a nod when Eddie tells him. Eddie doesn’t blame him. He’d seemed okay when they were at the pizza place, even though he’d coughed more and more and more throughout the afternoon, by the time they got back to Eddie’s place, even his whisper speaking was sounding painful.

Then, he’d looked even worse than he had at the graveyard, so tired and pale, if Eddie hadn’t had him over that first time, he might have been worried that Jason was re-zombifying. Getting ready to crawl right back to that graveyard and rebury himself.

Jason laughs when Eddie mentions this, that the laughter is cut off by more soft coughing keeps Eddie from feeling very proud of that accomplishment.

Now, Eddie’s lying in bed, staring at his ceiling, listening to Hellraiser playing softly on the T.V just on the other side of the this wall between his bedroom and the rest of the trailer. The sound doesn’t bother him, he can’t sleep when things are too quiet, so he leaves it on most nights himself just for the background noise. But now, he’s worried it’s maybe bothering Jason. Maybe that’s why he left the last time. Jason said it was just that something had come up, and he didn’t want to wake Eddie to say goodbye, he’d said he was sorry, and Eddie had told him it wasn’t a big deal, and he’d meant it, but he doesn’t want Jason to leave again.

That’s the only reason he rolls off his bed and steps over to the door, just to make sure.

Jason’s still awake, his head propped up on both his bent arm and the thin spare pillow Eddie gave him, he’s staring blankly at the Cenobites tearing Frank to pieces, a soft green blanket he brought along himself pulled up to his chin.

“Hey.” Eddie calls when Jason doesn’t seem to notice his presence.

Jason starts, partly sitting up eyes darting rapidly around the small space for a couple seconds before they settle on Eddie. Then he hums and cocks his head to the side.

“Are you okay with the T.V on?” Eddie whispers, not sure why seeing as it’s only the two of them here.

“Yeah.” Jason whispers back, but that a given seeing as how for whatever reason, he can’t talk any louder right now. “Did you.” He pauses to clear his throat. “Want it off?”

Eddie shakes his head. “Nah, just figured it’d bug you.”

Jason nods and settles back down, when he speaks again, it’s even softer than usual, so soft that Eddie almost doesn’t hear it. “Hate the dark.”

“Kay.” Eddie whispers back. “Night Jason.”

“Night Eddie.”

Eddie retreats to the confines of his room and crawls back into his own bed, leaving the door open behind him. He double checks his alarm before he pulls his pillow back to his chest and tries to get back to sleep.

What he hopes is only a few minutes later, but feels and most likely is a lot longer, Eddie’s staring at the ceiling again. He hasn’t heard anything from Jason in while, not shifting or coughing, and sound travels really well in here. He just rolls to the bottom of his bed this time and leans over to poke his head out the door.

Jason’s still awake, still watching Hellraiser, still looks tired enough that he should be a coma or something. Eddie almost reels back at the thought and tries his hardest to shake it from his mind.

“Jason?” He calls.

Jason props his head on the back of his hand to look across the room at Eddie.

“You sure you don’t need to go back to the hospital?”

Jason smile is genuine, if still tired when he shakes his head and gives a thumbs up.

“Kay, Night.” Eddie says for the third time.

“Night.” Jason’s reply, raspy and flavored with a dash of amusement is only audible because Eddie expects it.

Eddie nods and rolls back to the top of his bed, feeling a little dumb for asking for probably the millionth time today.

He goes back to staring at his ceiling, there are still some splotches from the water damage he’d repaired all that long ago, that he hadn’t gotten around to fixing up. The shape of it changes with the degree of squinting and head-tilting Eddie puts in to it. Right now, it doesn’t look like anything. It always looks like something. Eddie should be sleeping, not trying to make a picture out of the splotch on his ceiling.

He keeps at it though, because he’s not sleeping, and it’s better than disturbing Jason again. They both need to sleep.

The flickering light from the T.V slipping through his door draws Eddie’s sight from the shapeless splotch and he curls to his side to watch it, listens to the muted screams and gasps from the next movie on his horror playlist. Some of the sounds, he thinks, don’t sound quite so digital as they should, but he doesn’t go over to check.

Some minutes later, Eddie hears Jason get up. The plastic snapping of VHS tape covers, and the trailers at the beginning of Hellraiser two.

He listens along, his eyes growing heavy, and he thinks that maybe it’s a little messed up that it’s the familiarity of this movie that lulls him into a doze despite his dead friend curled up in the next room with a slit throat. If they were here, his parents would say it’s messed up. That Eddie’s messed up, but then, they’ve thought that since they’d found out he liked playing with the broken toaster more than the games his cousins played.

It wouldn’t have mattered what else he did. He knows they were always going to shunt him off somewhere, and he was just so, so lucky that he got Aunt Marla.

But thinking about that stuff is dumb, so he doesn’t, so he **tries** not to.

As long as Eddie listens, Jason doesn’t make another sound. Eddie’s tempted to poke his head out again, just to make sure one final time that Jason’s still breathing, but he knows that’s another thing nothing he does would make a difference there.

Nothing he’s done lately really has.

*******

Eddie wakes to the squawking of the most annoying sound he could dig up on the dark crevices of the internet for his alarm tone. So annoying he takes a moment to wonder why he thought that was worth it before he throws himself out of bed and stumbles like a poorly acted out zombie for the bathroom.

He has to hurry. It’s only stylish to be late for parties and only under special circumstances. Being early as possible is best for work. It’s professional, and as Eddie brushes his teeth – he bares the metallic tang of the water because he forgot to get more bottled yesterday and he doesn’t have time to run to the store for more - he vows he’s going to be the most professional guy on set.

He’s going to do everything he has to one hundred percent right and on time. No spacing out, no losing focus, not for **anything** … the trailer smells like bacon, Eddie hasn’t had bacon in here for a really long time.

The sound Eddie’s toothbrush makes when it taps the sink feels way too loud amidst the comparatively louder taps and clinks just on the other side of the thin wall.

“Jason.”

When Eddie pokes his head out the door, the first thing he sees is his pullout, pulled up and with the blanket that isn’t his folded at its end. Paper bags printed with the logo of the nearest convenience store are lying empty on the table, and Jason’s… He’s over by the stove Eddie never gets the time to use, making the trailer smell like bacon.

When Jason’s turns around, his mouth opens as though to speak, but he flinches when all that comes out is a pained, raspy noise. He waves instead, then motions between Eddie, the stove, and the table.

Eddie slinks over slowly and slides onto the seat. Jason smiles and turns back to the stove, the angle’s a little bad for seeing what Jason’s doing, but Eddie watches anyway. Jason moves some bacon around the pan, then reaches for a tray of eggs that Eddie definitely didn’t have yesterday. He cracks them open one handed and tosses the shells into the trash without looking, when they hit the hot surface of the pan, they shoot up hissing oil against the glass lid Jason covers them with soon after.

They’re unattended for just the few seconds it takes him to set two mugs on the table and fill them orange juice. Eddie didn’t have orange juice on hand yesterday either; he had none of what Jason’s working with right now. The only food in the trailer when Eddie went to bed was a loaf of bread, soda, and maybe a tin of baked beans buried behind the tools cluttering up the shelves.

Eddie hasn’t had a fresh breakfast at home, made up of actual breakfast foods in… a very long time, and then no one had gone and made him any kind of food in even longer.

“You’ve already been to the store **this** early?” Eddie doesn’t really mean it as a question, but Jason nods anyway as he plates up the toast and bacon. “You didn’t have to.” Eddie slumps down and stares morosely at the juice, Jason’s careless shrug doesn’t do much to make him feel better. “M kind of an awful host, huh?”

Jason rolls his eyes and shakes his head when he slides the plates onto the table and takes a seat next to Eddie with a thumbs up. Again he tries to say something, probably a joke if one were to go off of just his expression, but again he makes that painful rasping sound and flinches instead, this time bringing up a hand to press against his still thickly bandaged throat.

“That’s cause of the talking we weren’t sposed to do last night, huh?” Eddie himself winces at the pained expression on his friend’s face while Jason fishes out the same bottle of antibiotics called something he couldn’t be bothered learning to pronounce last night from his duffle bag.

With a heavy sigh that puffs his cheeks out like a blowfish, Jason nods at the pill he’d shaken from the bottle and dropped into his hand, and air of reluctant resignation about him. It’s purposely over the top, and a sign that he's more annoyed than anything by the loss of his voice right now.

“Hey,” Eddie says, cutting into his toast, “if you’re not even sposed to talk, shouldn’t you be on a mushier diet right now?”

Jason’s response is to fold his toast and eggs into a hasty sandwich and take a huge, emphatic bite that Eddie’s surprised he doesn’t choke on. He waves his hand dismissively at something in the distance and washes it down with half of his own glass of orange juice, which is probably what keeps him from the completely choking thing.

“You’re sure?” Eddie fights to keep the smile off his face, he should not be amused by his overly dramatic friend hurting himself, overly dramatic friend who was dead and… and now he’s here and made breakfast, and yeah it’s going to take a little longer for Eddie to process all of this than he thought.

It must be a while, that he sits, unmoving, staring off at nothing, because when Jason nudges him softly there’s worry behind the questioning way he holds up his thumb this time.

“I’m good,” Eddie grins back at his friend, “just…” and his second alarm chooses then to scream at him from the bedroom, “I’m gonna be late!” The rest of his food gets shoveled into his mouth fast as it will go and he’s rushing over the table to reach the screaming device, leaving Jason to hastily move Eddie’s unfinished glass of juice out of his path.

Processing stuff is going to have to wait until **after** he’s done great at his job on set today, he slung his messenger bag over his shoulder, grabbed his phone and paused at the door for just a second. “Thanks for breakfast!”

Jason waves back at him, blinking wide eyes blankly at the door as Eddie leaves. Five steps later, Eddie turns back around, and Jason’s still watching the door.

“I’ll uh, seeya when I get back?” Eddie sort of hates how hopeful his voice sounds when he asks it. Jason did ask to stay a while, but they hadn’t exactly talked about how long that was for Jason now.

His answer is another thumbs up and that surprised sort of smile he’s seen from Jason a couple of times already.

Eddie doesn’t hate the warmth spreading in his chest at that very much at all. “Bye Jason!” He calls out for good measure before he rushes out for his first day on his new job that he is most definitely going to be awesome at, and when he gets home, Jason’s still there to hear him brag all about it.


	3. Worry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be a comfortember fill for 'anxiety', but kind of missed the deadline for that, by a whole lot, so here it goes.  
Thankyou to Stephaniebrowndeservestoberobin on the jaysteph server for the beta!

The thing Eddie's parents had fought about the most - coming up ahead of chores, time, and Eddie himself - had been money. Some of his earliest memories had been his parents yelling about bills and back then he'd never understood **why**. As almost every movie they'd allowed him to watch that broached the subject had taught him; money didn't matter so long as you had the more important things in life. Often these important things where family, friends, and some holiday to bring them together.

Aunt Marla had reinforced that idea,the only time she fought about money was with the studio, and then it was to make an even better movie than she would have otherwise. Even when she'd left the studio and they'd ended up with half the money Eddie's parents had had.

"We have each other, Gopher, and we have our friends. I'd say we're doing pretty good for ourselves, huh?" She'd told him one night.

And Eddie had agreed, he still hadn't understood, he couldn't think of anything else he could possibly have wanted aside from something impossible, even with all the money in the world. That hadn't been two years ago. Now, Eddie is sixteen, his Aunt is gone, their friends have all moved on and Eddie is looking at yet another eviction warning sitting at the bottom of his P.O box because he doesn't even have the money to afford his tiny lot at a trailer park.

There are so many things Eddie needs, he hardly has the time to think about all the things he wants most days. Fresh food, a couple pairs of socks that don't have holes in them, a warmer pair of shoes to wear with those shoes when it got cold, repairs on the trailer he can't even afford to park so he doesn't have to spend so much on that bottled water. Some more time to himself to maybe take care of that on his own, if he doesn't end up wasting that time sleeping.

An end to the constant anxiety that comes with being as bad as he is at keeping jobs and finding new ones to replace those he loses. When he lets himself think about it, he's stuck in an exhausting loop and he can't come up with a way to break out of it, he can almost consider not trying anymore.

He hasn't had time to think about it in too long it seems, because this bill is making sure every pent up thing he should have been thinking. 

"I think I need to get another job." Eddie mutters to himself as he shuts the door behind him. The sharp tap that comes in response startles himself and in that second he forgets, almost, that he's got a house -trailer - guest now and he may or may not jump a foot off the ground before he remembers. "Jason," Eddie sighs, a hand pressed against his rapidly beating chest, "You're still here."

Eddie doesn't mean it as a question, but Jason acts shocked, book flying from his hands as he shoots up from his reclined position on the pullout and glancing about wide eyed, as if he can't believe the revelation Eddie's dropped on him. In the end, Jason simply shrugs, both hands splayed upwards, a look of confused resignation on his face. Eddie laughs, as much as he'd changed, a lot of his friend has stayed the same.

"You're done now?" Eddie asks, his brows raised.

Jason grins back at him, but thankfully doesn't try and make a verbal reply, Eddie's had enough of worrying his only friend right now is going to cough himself to death, despite Jason's assurances that it's nowhere near that dire. 

Jason scooches over, making room besides him for Eddie to drop his exhausted body. Jason nudges him, head cocked curiously.

"Just some more bills came by," Eddie waves the opened envelopes, nostalgic for the times when getting mail had been the highlight of his week. "There's this place near the studio looking for help, but...", but the opening was for a waiter, and Eddie had made for a terrible waiter the few times he'd managed to get hired as one. Now that was a job that required paying a lot of attention.

Somewhere in the time since Eddie had sat down and slipped into pondering his options, Jason had plucked the bills from Eddie's hand, and set to perusing them. Now again, he nudged Eddie, this time to show him the screen of his cell phone. '_I can take care of it._'

"Oh, no you can't." Eddie snatched the bills from Jason's hand and tossed them at the counter next to the sink. He brushed off Jason's questioning waves with, "Because you're not supposed to be doing stuff until you're healed up, I didn't say you could stay here because I needed help." Even if he did need help, he wasn't going to risk...

Jason tapped rapidly at his phone, '_Won't have to to anything I got plenty cash._' He showed it to Eddie, then went back typing, '_Not a problem._'.

To agree would be simultaneously all too easy and **impossibly** hard. Now, Eddie isn't an overly prideful person, not the kind who turns down help just because, or to prove a point or anything like that, or at least he tries very hard not to be. It's just... he knows Jason isn't here just because Eddie's letting him stay for free, and Eddie hadn't felt this way any of the times Jason had picked up groceries, or fixed things, or cleaned out the nooks and crannies of the trailer Eddie hadn't had the time or energy to take care of. Helping out with bills though, it just feels...

Jason taps Eddie's shoulder then draws his attention to his phone, '_If you work any more, we can't hang out. I'll get lonely :(._' The emoticon face comes off as more sincere than the one on Jason's face. So severe, Eddie might have thought someone had told him that no, he **couldn't** have that puppy and he was trying very hard to seem sad enough at the check-out to change their mind.

"That's not even your good manipulating face." Eddie responds, grudgingly impressed at how good at being a bad actor his friend can be sometimes.

Jason sighs, **deeply**, and sinks into the back of the un pulled out pullout, communicating with his eyes alone that he's very much not pleased at the foiling of his plan. He taps out a new note, '_Good roomates go half, you're keeping me from being a good roomate and impeding my self improvement._'.

Eddie snorts and doesn't feel the need to reiterate that Jason is a guest, he just throws up his hands in a mockery of shock, "Oh no, what have I done."

Jason grins a bright, genuine grin, genuine enough that it makes no attempt at hiding the weariness Jason's been carrying with him since he'd crashed back into Eddie's life. It's better than a faker smile that does hide those things would have been, he knows that this kind of honestly isn't something Jason dishes out easily. Eddie still doesn't know how to put into words how much the trust Jason's put in him means yet, so he hasn't tries. It makes the guilt that Eddie can't trust him the same way burn even more.

He thinks of his parents fighting over bills and... Eddie and Jason hadn't fought yet, but... "I just... I don't want us to wind up fighting over money down the line," he couldn't let go of the dread pooling in his gut at what might happen when they did. He doesn't want to be alone again.

Jason begins typing, '_Aren't we fi..._', but he changes his mind and erases it before he can finish. '_Money's no problem for me anymore,_' Jason moves his phone aside to cross his heart with a pinky finger, '_I would feel better if you let me pay my own way for once._' Instinctively, Eddie thinks Jason, someone who as far as Eddie remembers had been paying his own way earlier than most kids even had it conceptualized, must be joking again, but as he types, Jason's face is dead serious, set as the cement handprints down at Grauman's Chinese Theater. He looks to Eddie, to gage his reaction and in a second the look softens, still serious, but now again in the way that means he isn't, '_Never paid a legit bill before. New experiences!_'

Eddie knows he should at least crack a smile at Jason's attempt to lighten the mood at that last part but he's not as good at pretending, even badly, at covering over his emotions. "We can go half." Eddie acquiesced, holding out a hand in offer for Jason to shake, "But only if you're sure."

Jason squeezes Eddie's hand in his own, calloused, and warm, and real, he smiles his honest smile, and nods once. The he kicks up his bare feet, draping them again across the pull out as he begins typing away again. '_Did you know they remade the Amityville Horror_?'

"Yeah, twice." It's a blatant change of subject, but not one Eddies averse to, glad to put their previous discussion behind them. He kicks off his shoes to settle in more comfortably next to Jason, who's overcompensation for hishis lack of a voice with the most over the top expression of shock he can manage.

'_Marathon_?' Jason types out.

"Only if you don't pirate them." Eddie says, he could do with something scaring him without having to worry about any of the things that are **actually** terrifying him right now.

Predictably, Jason huffs at the only thing that comes close to an actual argument they **have** had since they'd settled in to their new living arrangement. Eddie's pleased to note, for the first time since he'd thought to do so, that it's nothing like when his parents had fought over the littler things that had come up. He dares to believe that when they do inevitably find something to really fight over, he'll note something similar about the big things.

The he settles in to watch the movies, their compromise being that Jason cam pirate the most recent movie, the one made by the studio his Aunt had left, which Jason does with a glee the small act of what he terms revenge didn't warrant. But honestly, Eddie wouldn't swap out his friends overdramatizations for anything.

And okay, maybe it is a little fun to dunk on the studio, so sue him... Like Verner Studios would like to for pirating their movie, but cant, Ha!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also, leave me and my inability to let one shots be alone.

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place right around Teen Titans v3 31, near the end of UTRH.


End file.
